Agony Amidst the Ecstasy

I think of my greatest heroes, the people I admire and respect the most – Martin Luther King Jr., Gandhi, Thomas Jefferson, Thomas Paine, Voltaire, Thoreau, Emerson, Walt Whitman, Blake, Dickens, Shakespeare, Spinoza (who has been called, “The prince of philosophers”, and rightly so), Aldous Huxley, George Orwell, Alan Watts, Peter Kropotkin, Thomas Merton, St. Francis, Jesus, the Buddha, Shankara and Lao Tzu, to name a few. What would they think about the society in which we now live? They would be thoroughly disgusted by it, and if they did not repudiate it entirely, they would be horrified by it. And they would certainly have some very strong words of reproach and correction to speak to it.

“It is the breaking of the root vow to refuse to give correction where correction is needed,
even if you can’t do it in the best possible way.”

 – The Bodhisattva Vows

I cannot keep pace with my fellow men, or women, because they are lost, and to keep pace would mean becoming lost with them. No, they must go their own way. I will go mine.

I will stay with the wisdom-holders of all time. That is my place. I have no place in this society; and the more I see of it, the less I want to have any place in it at all. Show me a ship, a horse, a sunset, or a dawn, and I will make my way, alone if need be, away from the madness that has become this world.

Nature is perfect in its simple majesty. Humankind has despoiled their nest, and is despoiling the rest; and it is a head-on collision course with reality which they are facing, though they have not the courage to admit it, much less deal with it, as would be prudent, and only sane.

If I cared about no one but myself, I would feel that my life is not only blessed, but beatific. I write, I study, I meditate, I pray, I have a beautiful little garden and place to live that I call home, and I have wonderful, loving family and friends. What more could I possibly ask for in this life? But I am tormented, anguished, overwrought, and utterly agonized, beyond all words, if not daily, then at least repeatedly, by the horrific state of the world, the suffering of my fellow living beings, and a deep and profound worry for them.

I have given my best, all my life, and will continue to do so, but I am painfully tempted to simply walk away, ride away, as Lao Tzu did, or sail away, and leave them to their madness, for they seem to have no ears to hear, and no eyes to see.

“Father please forgive them, for they know not what they do.”

JTR,
October 7, 2015

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